Having good manners is part of our Personal Image hence Business Etiquette is included in my speaking engagements and Appearance Management corporate workshops.
Etiquette is the rules of social behaviour, whilst manners are how we appply them. In the United Kingdom Royal and State occasions are the most formal  and ; they are organised by Buckingham Palace and guidance is always given to anyone invited.

Displaying good manners can be summarised simply as having respect for others as well as being considerate to other people.  Manners should be consistent, although as people travel more widely and we interface with numerous different cultures we need to be conscious of adapting these according to the people we are with, the environment and circumstances.

There are differences between social and business etiquette, e.g. in a business environment men and women must be given equal treatment; any distinctions are determined by rank and position. In a social context, on the other hand, women often find that men may show a level of attention like holding the door open or pulling out a chair.

Having good social skills enhances your personal and professional image and reputation. It can also give you the competitive edge and help you to stand out from the crowd. It strengthens relationships and with experience you will feel more comfortable as you develop personal poise and confidence. People like being with people they feel comfortable with and whose company they enjoy. Etiquette is about presenting yourself with the kind of polish that shows you can be taken seriously.

Good manners may not be commented on but bad manners will never be forgotten.

I will cover various subjects in future blogs for you to consider as good manners  in business.

Burns Night – Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Burns night is one of the most celebrated events in the Scottish cultural calendar, celebrated throughout the entire world. The Burns Supper can be a formal or informal occasion and is a celebration of Robert Burns.

What to wear to a Burns Night Supper?

If you’re Scottish then of course a kilt is the best for a man! The tartan, or plaid, pattern of your kilt should reflect the traditional  pattern of your ancestor’s clan. If you don’t come from a Scottish background and want to wear a kilt, consider using one of the more  universal tartans such as a Black Watch, Royal Stewart or a Jacobite pattern.

A more formal Burns Night supper ceremony may require a black tie dress code of dinner jacket and bow tie or a kilt or the Highland dress for the men and an evening dress for the ladies. Less formal Burns Night suppers may require men to wear a suit or jacket and tie with smart trousers whilst women a smart dress, a skirt or trousers with a smart blouse. It is often a good idea as a guest to wear an article of tartan clothing such as a tartan tie, tartan skirt, tartan trousers or even tartan socks or tartan tights. If you receive an invitation to attend an event the dress code for the Burns Night supper should be stated on the invitation or ticket.

How to Wear a Kilt

A man should wear a kilt that sits on his waist and falls to the middle of his knees. The pleats are at the back of the kilt. The jacket should coordinate with the formality of the event and with the rest  of your outfit.”Prince Charlie” jacket  is appropriate for weddings and other formal events.

It is important to wear the correct accessories with a kilt:

1. Sporran - strap on the sporran about three fingers below your waist
2. Hose - men usually wear hose (socks) in black or cream. Black was originally worn for funerals but is worn more often now. Cream is generally the best bet for evening or formal occasions.They should be folded two to three fingers below kneecap.
3. Flashes – place flashes on the outside of the leg, covering the strap with the fold of the  sock top.
4. Kilt pin - A kilt pin is decorative and it is intended to give the apron a little bit of  weight to keep it from flapping open.  Place a kilt pin on the open flap along the right-hand side.
5. Sgian-dubh -  a Gaelic  name, is a small, singled-edged knife worn tucked into The top of the kilt hose with only the upper portion visible. The sgian-dubh is normally worn on the right leg. To carry a sgian-dubh is legal in Scotland, England and Wales whilst the person wears a Scottish costume, but some say it is advisable not to wear it  if strolling in the street.
6. Ghillie Brogues – they need to be cross laced and pulled into simple knot. Twist three times and pull  tight again to create a thong. Pass laces around ankle back, bring to front and  tie a bow, letting laces and toggles hang in front.

If you are lucky enough to attend an event then enjoy and have fun and do try the haggis and whisky!

2012 is going to be tough according to many economists with the job market and business very competitive, therfore  it is important that you dress well and look professional for your work or business. It is also important to have comfortable and smart clothes for relaxation and social events so you feel and look happy and confident.

After 16 plus years as an image consultant, helping people with their wardrobe, here are Appearance Management ‘s suggestions on what to consider to achieve a great wardrobe:

10 tips for a great wardrobe to suit your lifestyle and budget:

1. Ensure your clothes fit you well, consider alterations where necessry. It will pay dividends when your clothes look like they belong to you and show your figure at its best.
2. Ensure your clothes are clean, neat and tidy at ALL times.
3. Take time to sort your wardrobe. Try mixing and matching items, to give your outfits a different look and make a change.
4. Mend items when they need it or take them to a tailor or dressmaker. They will last longer and look better. This includes wearing trousers at the correct length so that they do not fray.
5. Plan what you need for the various events in your life and look out for bargains where you have gaps and need new items.
6. Colours should mix and match, so choose a family of shades  that suit you and that go with one another. Have key items in neutral shades e.g. black, navy, grey or camel.
7. Add accessories to your clothes to update them, adapt them for various occasions and to change your look.
8. Swop with a member of the family or friend, especially items you are not keen on or for an event you do not go too very often.
9. Dye items when colours have faded or are the incorrect colour to go with your other items.
10. Have layered items for the changeable weather, wear a vest or thick cardigan in the cold, light weight tops work well in the warmer weather or can be worn underneath on cold days.

The cost of household bills is increasing and so now is not the time to waste money on clothes you do not need or wear. Sorting, organising and planning is key. A little time spent on your wardrobe will pay dividends and will give you extra money for holidays or for saving. Buy the best quality you can afford so they last longer.

As the film “The Iron Lady” with Meryl Streep opens this week, much is talked about Margaret Thatcher and her style of clothes.  Whether you admire her or not, as the first woman to become the leader of a political party and then to go on to be the first woman Prime Minister in the UK there are some things us women can learn from her “signature look”.

Margaret Thatcher changed her style over the years and learnt to understand what suited her and what she felt comfortable in. Her wardrobe personality type was very much a classic – romantic. She enjoyed her power dressing skirt style suits but softened them with romantic pretty blouses. As a woman who worked in a man’s environment she learnt to have clothes to suit her and her position.

What are the things we can learn from Lady Thatcher’s style and approach to clothes:

1. She knew what styles complimented her shape and that she felt comfortable in
2. She was always well presented, neat and tidy
3. She bought quality, value for money, with very good tailoring
4. She chose a few classic items as her key pieces that would last and added several blouses that would mix and match with her classic suits and add variety
5. She wore dresses and coats when travelling so that her outer coat looked fresh and pristine when she stepped off the plane to meet other foreign leaders
6. Her evening wear was simple and elegant and skirts could be mixed with a variety of tops
7. Ensured she always looked her best 7 days a week, as she worked 7 days a week, and she was aware that she never knew who would see her
8. She chose block colours and wide shoulders to compliment her shape, only changing the details of sleeves and nothing exaggerated in her styles.
9. Her accessories (shoes, bags and jewellery) were good quality, classic style to reflect her wardrobe personality and always went with all her outfits.
10. She was conscious to always have a budget. Lady Thatcher’s style may not be our own wardrobe personality or suited to the business we are in, but we can all learn how to use the principles for a good basic wardrobe that will be the foundation of looking simple and elegant as a professional woman.

During cold weather it is important to ensure you wrap up and keep warm. Wear layers so you can easily add or take off the items too suit the environment. Make sure your wardrobe has the right items of clothes.

10 items to keep you warm:

1. Chunky Knits – this season’s fashionable chunky knits are ideal to keep you warm e.g. Fair Isle,  roll neck to crew neck, wool shawl collar cardigans, cricket sweaters.

2. Skinny knits – ideal for warmth in frosty weather to wear under chunky cardigans and sweaters.

3. Coats – several styles and colours are available and are ideal for keeping you warm in all weathers, including duffle and parkas for less formal wear.

4. Boots and wellies – ideal for snow and walking in muddy woods. My suggestion for women would be to have flat boots to avoid falling or slipping on the ice.  Rubber soles are better for ice and snow to avoid sliding, but ensure your rubber soles are not worn.

5. Hats & Gloves – it is important to keep your head and hands warm.  Wear a hat and gloves that fit to keep you warm. Avoid them being too tight as this reduces your circulation and they will cool faster than if you have some wiggle room. Mittens are warmer than gloves because the heat generated from your fingers is shared. There are many colours and styles on the market. Fingerless gloves offer practicality. Consider what you want them for and what materials you like e.g. wool, leather or Gor-tex for use in the snow and wet.

6. Thermal underwear – ideal to keep you warm, yet you can still wear your favourite items on the top.

7. Scarves – great for keeping you warm indoors and out;  adds colour and style to any outfit. Choose one that reflects your wardrobe personality.

8. Pyjamas, nightdress, bed socks – if you feel the cold at night, these are a must-have.

9. Cashmere- a fine texture, light, soft and strong. Looks great, can be worn with anything and keeps you extremely warm.

10.  Warm socks to keep your feet warm – avoid too tight and too many, like gloves your feet need room. Suggest you avoid cotton as it holds water and perspiration, wear only one pair of synthetic or wool liner socks.

Remember to Drink Water even if it is an ice-cold one as it helps you stay warm. You can become dehydrated, even in the cold, and water helps to keep your blood pumping.  

New Year should be about what we want to achieve in the New Year, filled with positive thoughts. This means wearing colours that uplift us. Unfortunately David Cameron was looking very depressing in his dark colours on BBC, not the most inspiring or uplifting.

New Year is a new beginning and a chance to think about what we want to positively achieve in the New Year.  Wearing colours that uplift us can make a big difference to how well we achieve this.  Unfortunately David Cameron’s dark colours on the BBC, made him look rather depressing and neither inspiring nor uplifting for his New Year message.

I think he receives advice from PR consultants not image consultants and he seems to have a small selection of plain colour ties.

With the current economic climate being so distressing I would suggest he thinks of wearing:

Yellow with navy – this is an uplifting colour, the closest to sunshine. It also stimulates the brain helping you to be decisive, clear-headed and alert.

Purple or violet –  a colour closely linked to creativity and arousing us into activity.

I would suggest he changes his shirt to a light blue or a stripe with green and blue in the evening.  Blue is a quiet, calming and relaxing colour, whilst green creates comfort and relaxation.

It is surprising how much colour can affect our emotions and influence people. Knowing the correct shades of colour to wear and how to combine them to compliment our skintone can make a great difference to how we look and feel.

Another New Year is upon us, so  it is also a good time to adapt and gradually change a few habits. As an image consultant who speaks and runs workshops on Business Etiquette, I think Casual dress is either something suited to a business or it is not and “Casual Friday” is rather dated in the current economic environment. So why not start “Etiquette Friday” where you make a point of communicating pleasantries with your colleagues. A good start would be to always use your “Ps and Qs”; the amount of people that either use them occasionally or not at all is shocking.

Suggestions to take action for Etiquette Friday:

• Say “Good Morning” to someone in your company when first  meeting them whether walking through the office or whilst travelling in the lift.
• Have a coffee with someone you email regarding work and get to know the person.
• Smile as you walk around the office and say good morning or good-bye as you turn up or leave the office.
• Ensure you thank the person that opens a door for you or open the door for them.
• Thank people for delivering your coffee or making a sandwich when you pick them up and smile.
• Avoid making lots of loud phone conversations on public transport  that irritate other people.
• Walking in public, give up – eating on the move, ear pieces with  your iphone or iPod, talking loudly on your mobile which irrates other people you as pass as it ends up as you shouting in their ears as you pass them.
• Stop playing your iPod so loudly that the person next to you also has to listen to it.
• Don’t simply push past someone remember to say “Excuse me,  please” and then say “Thank you”.

Good manners are about being considerate to others and understanding the rules of etiquette and then applying them. We need to treat people as we wish to be treated.

Remember to give eye contact when speaking to others and “Give a smile away! A smile costs nothing but gives much. A smile creates happiness in the home and fosters goodwill in business and it is the sign of friendship”.

During the holiday season is an opportunity to relax and chill out and wear relaxed style clothes. However, it is not the time to look scruffy and unkempt. Ensure you look good for your partner, family and friends.  It is an ideal time to have the right image and make an effort to look your best,  for the most important people in your life.

It is important you dress to suit your wardrobe personality so you are comfortable and feel good. When you look good you will also feel good and people will react to you in a more positive way.  Dress sloppy and you attitude will be more sloppy. Dress to suit the occasion whether it is relaxing at home, going for a walk, down the pub with friends or out for a nice meal.  It is key to have your clothes fitting you well and that you are clean, tidy and presentable. This includes your hair, nails and shoes.

Last of all smile, be happy, make the most of the break and have a great time!

Buying presents for people at Christmas can be difficult and will they appreciate and like the present when they open it? I am often asked for advice, as an image consultant, I recommend you think what they would enjoy and like not you.

10 Tips to help you:

1. Always make a list with ideas and plan a budget
2. When shopping stay focused and keep as near as you can to your individual budgets, but allow for some extra in your total budget
3. Don’t feel pressured to spend a lot of money, or any money, because you feel people will expect you to. Only spend what you can afford
4. Always consider the likes and dislikes of the recipients
5. When you know the person well, you can give a slightly more personal gift
6. When purchasing clothes or accessories for someone else, always buy the item that represents the person’s personality and not yours.  Consider are they conservative, rather casual, very sporty, high fashion, rather dramatic or creative?
7. When buying for a parent or a grandparent consider updating their wardrobe (but to suit their personality) e.g. new season’s colour in a jumper, a stripe shirt, scarf, colourful socks or gloves
8. Considering giving money as a gift, then why not “wrap it” in a nice way
9. Love cooking; why not make a basket of special goodies you have made
10. Buy something related to their interests e.g. Men – do they love electronic gadgets, wallets, handyman tools, clothes, skincare or aftershave. Women – are they a lover of jewellery, plants, flowers, clothes, perfumes, cooking or sports stuff.

On the day remember it is the thought that counts. Remember your manners, and do write a thank you note for all the presents you receive and ensure, if you have children, that they do as well. It will encourage them not only to be polite but they may well become a future author by thinking about what to say.

“The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.” Oscar Wilde

It’s the time of year when you socialise with your colleagues and an opportunity to show what you are like outside work. Make sure you have a positive impact with your colleagues and bosses. Have good manners, have a great appearance and enjoy  the event or at least look like you are! Show your sense of humour, be a good listener as well as talk, smile and be happy.

Manners: If you are talking a partner ensure you introduce them to your colleagues and find topics they may have in common so they can chat comfortably.  Allow your partner to feel part of the event, as it is good for everyone. Have good table manners and be polite at all times.

Appearance: Wear something fashionable (doesn’t need to be high fashion) to show you are modern but still be professional. It doesn’t need to be boring. First of all consider what type of event it is. Is it a full black tie event, fun party, dinner, dinner and disco or a lunch time event from work.

10 Tips for Women:

1. Avoid low cut and too short an outfit
2. Choose a style that compliments the best area of your body e.g. waist, legs, neck and chest
3. Cover the areas that are your weakest e.g.  tops of arms, waist, legs above the knee
4. Add interesting accessories to reflect your personality
5. Wearing  a simple black dress? Then add coloured tights , colourful scarf  or a simple pendant
6. Wear makeup that reflects your personality  e.g. sparkly, simple and elegant or dramatic and bold
7. Choose shoes that are comfortable and you can walk in
8. Hair – ensure it’s clean and refresh, wear it up, full or curly to suit your face. Test it out before the event
9. Nails – chose a polish to suit your outfit, wear a neutral or  French polish or give yourself  a simple neat manicure
10. Have a fresh breathe – clean teeth

7 Tips for Men:

1. Wear something different to the party that you don’t wear to the office
2. Try a new colour shirt, pattern shirt or fancy cardigan
3. Wear some cufflinks to reflect your personality
4. Wear different shoes to work e.g. oxblood, brown  loafers
5. Hair – ensure it is clean, neat and tidy. Adapt the style if possible
6. Be well groomed – clean nails and shoes
7. Have a fresh breathe

Enjoy the party, smile and have fun. However remember it is a work’s event so don’t over indulge  on the drink and food. You will have to face your colleagues again.  Remember others may have a camera!