Etiquette Friday – Being Shy or Being RudeBy Angela Marshall, 15th Feb 2013
I continue my quest from 2012, when each Friday you join me in my campaign to change “Casual Friday” to “Etiquette Friday” and to encourage people and companies to get involved. Hopefully my messages have reminded you to make some small changes, and that people will be more considerate to others and more aware of their manners. The goal in turn will create a more pleasant and positive society.
Being Shy or Being Rude
In a social environment or in a business situation a person that is shy can be mistaken as rude. However rarely will a rude person be taken as shy; they are generally more verbal and expressive with their body language and show a lot more confidence. If you appear distant and unable to interact with people very easily you may give the impression you are not interested in or don’t care about others. It is important to communicate with people whether in a social or business environment, but that doesn’t mean to say you have to try to be extremely chatty.
Shy people can be people who like to be quiet and yet can be creative or practical people, if you are one of these don’t feel bad about being shy, but practice basic conversation abilities. Try asking open questions when you meet people. If you talk to people they will talk back, you don’t have to talk about yourself or be a great conversationalist. In fact it is good not to talk all about you and find out about the other person not only do people like talking about themselves but it also helps to broaden your outlook and interests. Consider asking people a lot of general questions and most people will soon talk to you.
What is key is that you value yourself and that you are not shy due to a lack of self esteem and confidence. Sometimes shy people are basically overly critical of themselves and of others, or they don’t want to say anything stupid. If this is the case, then consider working on improving both your self esteem and confidence. One way to do this is to consider an image consultation which will help you look and feel good about yourself. Feeling comfortable with how you are viewed by others can go a long way to improving your self-belief and confidence.
Quiet people are often very resourceful and self-reliant. The solution is to practice talking to strangers and you will gradually develop some basic conversation abilities. As we get older we generally get more confident as we meet new and different people.